Throwing out the couch...

I had been told these suckers are afraid of movement, noise and light. Apparently mine were quickly overcoming their fears. After the treatment began I was finding them in my daughter's bedroom, my bedroom, the living room and the kitchen. The bathroom seemed to be the only safe haven. I had read that relocating sleeping areas within the infested dwelling would be fruitless and only aid in the spread as these suckers would find you. No place was safe. There would be nights though, where I would work myself into exhaustion so that sleep was no longer a choice. I couldn't willingly subject myself to the nightly feeding frenzy. And then there were nights that I just couldn't bring myself to lay down on their dinner table and I would fall asleep in the bathtub. I never slept on the couch, not at night anyways. But one day, exhausted from the OCD cleaning and sleep deprivation, I gave into sleep as I lay on my couch at 3pm in the afternoon. It was a comfortable couch and pretty too. Microsuede, cushiony and blue. I woke up with a start as I felt a pinch on my back. I rubbed my back, looked at the pillows, moved them around and saw nothing. I decided to ignore it. I was tired of this. I laid back down and 2 seconds later I felt another pinch. "That's it!" I cried as I ran to the bathroom mirror to inspect my back. Sure enough there were 2 bites right next to each other. I informed my daughter I needed her help, we were throwing out the couch. We took a knife to the pillows, cushions and couch as instructed to make the furniture undesirable so as no dumpster divers would be tempted with such a great find. My pretty blue couch, only 1 1/2 years old, we slid down the stairs, through the parking lot and abandoned it right next to the dumpster. It was at that point my daughter said she realized how serious this was and that I was not just being mean. What a memory she will have when she gets older....the day my mom jumped off the couch and exclaimed, that's it-we're throwing out the couch. I feel like I have lost my mind. I am sure my neighbors are thinking the same.